I have never been a very patient person. Waiting just makes me anxious, so I try not to do it very often. Of course, when waiting for a baby, one doesn't have the luxury of not waiting. So basically, I'm anxious. The funny thing about this round is that some of those concerns I had with Jaycee are there. Like, having a happy healthy baby, being a good dad, and all those other general concerns. At the same time, I noticed that a lot of those other fears from round one are gone. Like, changing diapers, how much my life would change, having a girl, and all those other fears of the unknown.
I am kind of entering this step with confident cautiousness. Sort of like when you watch a clip on T.V. where someone falls off a bike and breaks his leg. You know its coming and you are kind of curios, but you also turn your head slightly like it makes it easier to watch out of the corner of your eye.
This is just one of those times where I just want it to be here. The more time I'm left to myself the more anxious I get. Not to say ALL the anxiety is bad. I am really anxious to see Jaycee interact with her sister and am excited to see her in the role of big sister. I am SO looking forward to holding a tiny little creature that won't squirm out of my arms and I can't wait to rock a newborn until she falls asleep with her little hands and feet and toes and lips and nose. I guess kids are kind of like potato chips, you can't just have one... unless that's all you want...
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