Still Learning...

It is a little sad to me to sit here and write this thinking that 20 years from now, I won't remember every single moment that happened today with Jaycee or her growing sister. For example, after dinner I sat Jaycee down to have dessert (pumpkin pie in case you were wondering). She wanted to stand to have her dessert, which I generally don't allow, but decided to let her when I saw how excited she was. After a few minutes of standing on the chair and eating, Jaycee leaned over to me, gave me a gigantic hug and a wonderful kiss. It pains me to think that I won't remember that specific moment that was so important to me today. Sure, there will be the rare occasion that something crazy happens and I'll remember it forever, but inevitably the memory will get fuzzy around the edges and turn in to more of a folk story than an event. It happens to all of us I guess and it is a part of life. That doesn't mean I have to like it. Then another life lesson emerges from the teachings of the wisest 19 month old I have ever met. Jaycee won't remember any of this either. She won't remember the hug and kiss from today, or our terrifying emergency room visit last year that turned out to be the overreaction of two scared new parents. She won't remember how it felt to go to the zoo or Alaska as a family. You know what she will remember though? She'll remember that her daddy loved her from day one. She'll remember that daddy has always protected her and guided her, encouraged and smiled for her, and she'll remember that no matter what this crazy world throws at her, her daddy will always be right behind her to catch her. If for some crazy reason, Jaycee or her siblings are reading this twenty years from now: I can only hope you got half as much from me that I got from you. And I hope you know how much I love you. And I hope you aren't reading this as late at night as I am writing it...