New fun... New Fear...

I am in total awe (sometimes denial) of how quickly Jaycee is growing and changing.  First she was smiling and baby babbling and now she is rolling over and teething.  I find myself thinking about the near future: crawling, walking, talking, texting (etc.).  We are having so much fun and we have so much more fun ahead of us.  I have encountered one problem with all these changes and all this fun: FEAR.  I never pictured myself as the worrisome parent.  I never thought I was going to be afraid to leave the room while Jaycee is sleeping soundly or that I would wake up a million times a night to check on her.  It seems like every development presents another concern.  For example, when I change her I can't even reach down to grab a diaper or she'll flip over on her stomach and reach for things that aren't baby friendly.  Oh, and that is a another problem now.  I thought our house was baby friendly!  I was obviously wrong, because Jaycee is quick to point out the flaws.  See, babies aren't required to read or acknowledge child safety warnings.  So that plastic bag that happens to be on the edge of the counter, somehow ends up in her chubby little grasp while she is slung over my shoulder.  I try to make a special effort to try and relax.  I try not to sweat the small stuff.  I guess I am starting to realize I cannot keep up.  Jaycee is changing faster than I am.  It's like she knows where she is going all the time and I am chasing behind her with a diaper bag and band-aids and the gap is getting wider.  I hope I don't sound like I am so stressed I can't be happy, because I am happy.  I am happy to see that my little girl is well on her way to a happy/healthy life.  I accept that my only responsibility in this world is to catch her when she falls (figuratively and literally).  Sometimes I think it would be easier to not let her fall and hold her up.  Then again, I wonder sometimes who is holding who up.  Is it me, being there to block out the bad and keep Jaycee smiling?  Or is it Jaycee, giving me another reason to wake up grateful for my life, my wife, and my family and keeping her neurotic father smiling?